February 28, 2011

February

Every year, February is the shortest month. Usually it's a mercy. Today it's just cruel.

February 27, 2011

468 neue Benachrichtigungen

Today, at the end of a Facebook email: You have 468 neue Benachrichtigungen. Visit Facebook now to see what's happening with your friends.

Why the mixed languages? And how does it know I'm heading to Germany?

February 26, 2011

New Messages

I turn on my cell phone to two new messages.

From Aaron: "Greetings from the Verizon store."

From Liisa: "I got you a postcard at Santa's Post Office. We're in Rovaniemi, just passed the Arctic Circle." <3

To Germany... Weakly...

Want some German, since I'm leaving, like, TOMORROW MORNING? Ich kann kaum schlucken. I can hardly swallow. I feel pretty miserable, sore throat and fatigue. Getting on a plane to a foreign country and having to speak German (of all languages) and deal with strangers etc all on my own is a pretty intimidating thought to face right now. And just now I'd give a lot for an extra week here on the beach.

February 24, 2011

Sweden and Norway

For those who wonder...

My favourite ever country names are Sweden and Norway. Not even because I like the countries - take that out of the equation. I also just love the names. Country names like Thailand and Finland amuse me greatly, because it just seems like a rather simplistic construction - where do Thai people belong? In Thai-land. Where do Finns belong? In Fin-land.

But Sweden and Norway are just great. Sweden mostly because it has "Eden" in it. So, it's like Swedish Paradise, but all clever and beautiful, like a well-crafted brand name. The name Norway I've loved ever since I heard it breathed through refrigerated spray on a Disney Epcot ride. Norway, Norroway, the way to the north. Just delicious.

Changes

This whole break, I've felt a sense of rising readiness. And now things have busted wide open.

February 21, 2011

Biannual Shopping Event

I go shopping for relatively major items about twice a year. Last summer, for example, I ended up getting a lot of things I needed and have used a lot since - my SLR (and everything that goes with that), a waterproof camera, waterproof hiking boots, all terrain sandals, two pairs of nicer sandals for going out, a North Face waterproof jacket. This time around wasn't quite as costly, but it still needed to happen.

Barnes and Noble: ($20)
A journal for Germany
A Beginner's German Dictionary (lots of great phrases and grammar alongside vocab)

Peltz: ($50)
A new pair of black street shoes

Best Buy: ($110)
An 8 GB Memory Card for the cameras
A 750 GB Passport External Hard Drive

Sports Authority: ($80)
An Under-Armour Shirt
A pair of Hiking Socks
Ski-Pants

Also, for Christmas/Birthday I got an amazing new suitcase and an extra large silk sleepsack, and a gift certificate to the used clothes store where I bought 12 new tops. The hope is that I'm now good until next fall. :)

February in Florida

February so far is my favourite month in Florida. That's convenient, because it's my least favourite month back home in Missouri. It makes a good point for being a snowbird, I have to say. Already gone with January are the horrible, horrible days where you had to wear a jacket on the boat and deal with the dreaded sea-fog. We're back to sunny blue skies and the water in the intercoastal sparkling grey and filled with dolphins. There were five of them at once when I looked out yesterday.

I'm down to less than a week to go before Germany. I'm doing some laundry, some packing. I'm about to step out for some last minute purchases - like a new pair of street shoes and a little external hard drive. Tomorrow lunch with grandma, learning to drive a manual car... Wednesday writing club and a luncheon afterwards... Thursday meeting Kris and Kai for Thai food... Friday off to Sarasota with Mary... Saturday my 21st birthday/going away part with the family.... Sunday my flight leaves for Deutschland. There's other stuff going on, too. A Skype conversation until the early hours of the morning. I have no time for any choices, but I'm just going with it for now.

February 14, 2011

Returning to Cologne

It's Valentine's Day, February 14th, and in exactly 2 weeks (February 28th, naturally) I'm off. There's a sweet symmetry in those dates, and an even sweeter one when I think about where I'm entering Germany.

Cologne is the first place I ever saw outside of the United States. I was 14 years old and fascinated by foreign languages on the wind, train departure/arrival boards with clacking, moving type, and the unthinkable prospect of naked adults in the hotel steamroom. Despite my eager best intentions, the trip was a mess. We came during a cold snap, without proper clothing, we didn't understand the public transportation, none of us spoke a word of German (or any other language), and my mom was so prepared to hate German food that in fact we never tried any. We ate at Cologne's Hardrock Cafe (a.k.a. the American Embassy) every single night of our stay.

I never thought of coming back. Certainly not as a college student, preparing to spend six months in the country perfecting my German. I couldn't have imagined that I'd have a good friend, a native of Cologne, waiting for me when I got off the plane. To me, the city is a strange place only half remembered - a city of cold wind and grey and intelligibility. And of course, the Cathedral looms - the first Cathedral I had ever seen - such a huge, strong building, with such a heavy and frightening darkness about it. Afterwards, no other cathedral has been able to affect me the same way. The Notre Dame only a week later was already something of a disappointment.

When I think of Cologne, I only think of cold mornings, mystery, and confusion - wandering around in the shadow of that huge cathedral, the gargoyles and statues above the doors staring at me silently, the pigeons, as coal black as the cathedral itself, flying up past its towers. It will be good to go back. To see if it's real, and anything like I remember.

Raising the Bar on the Bare Minimum

Studying abroad makes you More Confident, the brochures promise. More Worldly. More Flexible. More Adventurous. More Marketable. More Better, if I may be so bold. I'm even happy to add a few - how about More Organized? The consensus is that it pretty much leaves you better prepared for the world. There are a lot of reasons. You learn more about the world both for obvious reasons (you're living in another part of it), and for less direct reasons (you realize it's actually useful to know more about the world.) You're more marketable because companies feel more global when they hire you. But the main thing, I think, is that when you study abroad, you simply have to get better. Whatever little weaknesses you're used to sweeping under the rug and covering up with your strengths just aren't going to fly anymore. Being in another country just makes everything a little bit harder. In other words, it raises the bar on the bare minimum.

I had a friend who was afraid of giving presentations in class. He goes to Spain, and, guess what? Not only does he have to give the presentation, he has to give it in Spanish, in front of native speakers. Wasn't easy, but he did it. And he comes home and suddenly it seems a lot more manageable to present something he's learned in his native language, in his native language.

Another friend leaned on her parents more than she should have. Awkward phone call about a discrepency in her utility bill? Problems getting in the classes she wanted? She'd just call up mommy and daddy. Suddenly she found herself in Spain, hundreds of miles away from them - and even if they'd tried to help, they didn't speak a word of Spanish. She was on her own. Wasn't easy, but she did it. And she comes home and realizes, hey, I am capable.

And where have I grown? That's easy. Organization. I've always been a mess, but my good memory managed to get me through the first 20 years of my life. I'd tried but never been able to make or keep a date book or packing list. Abroad, through, there was enough stress in my life without worrying about remembering when that project was due or which weekend I was going surfing in France. I had to start writing things down. Wasn't easy, but I did it. And I surprised even myself when I had the presence of mind to email myself a list of every item I'd shipped ahead to Germany for the second semester.

Back home, you might have to 'deal' with your fears and weaknesses, 'compensate' for them. That'll take you a long way, but it won't take you all the way. Sometimes you have to push yourself just a little bit farther in order to conquer the problem once and for all, and study abroad is an excellent way to do that.

February 13, 2011

Worrying about Tomorrow

Maybe it's because my friend Tina is awesome. Maybe it's because of my new Flip Video. Maybe it's because at writing club someone gave me an old book called The Travel Writer's Handbook, which I've read three times in the last week. Maybe it's because I have my energy fully back and ready to take off again.... (/random)

Maybe it's because I realized I'm fully halfway through college, (and that's considering that I'm dragging it out an extra year), and that the easy fun times won't last forever. Maybe it's because I've made it a goal to post once a day on my travel blog, and that's bringing me face to face with realities such as targeting audiences and marketability.... (/serious)

Maybe it's because in a very narrow way I can start considering myself published and legitimate - I just won a small but nice sum in a state-level study abroad photography contest, had a tiny picture published in the newspaper of Turku, Finland, and, best of all, wrote my first post on the MU Study Abroad Blog. The blog may be even less lucrative than the photo contest, but hey, it's a paid travel writing gig. I applied, I was chosen, I'm going to a good job and I'll have something (not much, but something) to point at when someone wants to see something I've done... (/yeeps!!)

But I'm suddenly approaching this in a new, more serious, more realistic way. And sometimes it scares me... okay, scratch that. It scares me a lot, period. But sometimes I think I can do it, and sometimes I want to just go straight into teaching instead. So then I close my eyes for a moment, remember that I'm still in University (not too early to try a few things, but too early to say I can't do it :P), that I'm doing a lot of the right things (my degrees all work well, I'm working on my languages, I'm getting in experience traveling, writing, and taking pictures, I'm networking (could do better at this though), I've marked off next summer for an internship of some sort, and I've got tentative ideas about what I could do in the first year or two out of college.)

It's so easy to jump off to either extreme - decide that there's plenty of time and everything will work out fine and go back to sleep, or to freak out and decide I can't do it and run away. Of course it's scary now. Any sort of career or even paying taxes or utilities is scary to me now. Things are scary until you start doing them. I'll advance and the shadows will shrink. What I need to do is stay balanced between the two things - keep the dreams on my mind, so that I can keep moving in the right direction towards reality.

Cringes

I have to stop reading this girl's blog.

Under "10 things I have learned the hard way in Barcelona"

"4. Catalan is nothing like Spanish. I can’t understand the television in catalan, I can’t read signs and I especially can’t understand when an old man on the metro starts a conversation with me in Catalan. Simply say that you don’t speak Catalan. Or they will keep speaking, like this old man did, for the entire metro ride."

"8. This is weird but I realized today that dogs speak/listen in Spanish here. So does this mean that if my dog, Shanti, met a Spanish dog, they would communicate differently? Do their barks have accents?"

The first one just makes me sad for the poor old man. And different languages = different languages. Catalan is actually pretty similar to Spanish considering that it's a DIFFERENT language. The second one just hurts. I thought that was a joke.

A long rant about how hard it is to travel (which includes lots of mistakes that, yes, could happen to anyone - but the fact that they ALL happened to you should say something about your fact checking ability) includes: "We then get off the plane, find the bus and realize that we booked the opposite tickets for the bus. We booked from Brussels to Charleroi on Friday and Charleroi to Brussels on Sunday. Luckily, the lady at the ticket counter was nice. However, standing in the line that was 30 minutes didn’t make us too happy. Standing in the line gave me a little bit of culture shock, simply because everyone around us was speaking French and German and Flemish, all three languages that I am not familiar with at all. It was definitely intimidating considering we had no way to communicate at all." You made a pretty major mistake booking the ticket. They're nice enough to change it for you for free, but it didn't make you too happy to wait in line so they could do so? And you get culture shock because people around you are speaking other languages, and you 'can't communicate'? You're in Belgium. I guarantee you anyone you're going to want to talk to speaks English.

She does have some good posts and observations too. That, and the fact that she's in a very similar situation to the one I was in last semester, and because I'm too lazy to remove her from my feed, are why I keep reading. But the cringes are just too many and close together.

February 08, 2011

Snow and Sea Fog

There's snow today in 49 states - can you guess which is the odd one out?

Mizzou has shut down several days in a row, due to 'upcoming predicted disastrous and historic weather events' - A.K.A. a blizzard that dumped TWO FEET of snow on Missouri (more on states to the north and the west). They shut down the main highways. Tabi said that the local roads are empty, too, except those few people who can walk to critical jobs, and the apparently unstoppable UPS trucks. Tina made a video about what it meant to be one of Mizzou's 'situationally critical' employees - namely that the R.A.'s are shoveling snow and staffing the dining halls.

But they can't complain. Because you know what? In Florida we have SEA FOG. That's right. This morning it was so thick, I couldn't see Winn-Dixie from the library. Temperatures on the beach sometimes drop overnight to the icy 40's.

February 02, 2011

A Pamplona Video